Libertadores FC
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2015
- Messages
- 2,835
- Reaction score
- 738
- Points
- 113
- Supports
- Universitario, Napoli
Not meant to be an attention seeking post but just a little story about how football has really helped me and is my main therapy...
Anyways, I returned to Peru back last year and I ended life in Canada with some depression. I was staying at home, gaining weight with no one to talk to. I had friends but they were always busy and quite careless about going out. My parents and brother were always out of the house and I really wasn't very happy. That wasn't the reason I moved away as I've been trying to go back to Peru since I was 12. Of course, I wasn't going to be able to look after myself at that age, so when I became 18 I was able to wait until I finished school and finally got my move back despite my parents not exactly being on board with it.
I was really happy when I went back. I got in contact with a lot of my kindergarten friends whom I haven't talked to in 12 years, and they were much more outgoing than the friends I had in Canada, but that's not what this story is about. It relates to football and mental health. I've always been an anxious person, unfortunately. My anxiety attacked me in April and a bunch of my newer mates decided to escape while the ones who truly missed me since kindergarten stuck with me although nowadays they've seen me sufferring so much that the friendship just isn't the same anymore. As for my college mates, they don't really know I'm depressed. I've tried my best to hide it.
Nowadays, its becoming a serious problem. I've not being going to classes and have began thinking about hurting myself but always decide against it mostly due to fear. However, before you stop reading thinking this is one of my narcistic attention seeking stories, this is where football kicks in.
I've always been criticized for my football opinions. Before, it used to get to me a lot because I thought it would affect my journalism dreams. Now, not so much. I'm already working for press and they all value my opinions just as I value theirs. I've learned to not take it so seriously as unfortunately some people don't know the meaning of "respect". Sure, exist bizarre opinions, whether its in someones elses view (saying Hamsik is the best 10 in the world) or just in general (saying Kings Lynn is better than Bayern Munich) but at the end of the day, most opinions are to be respected even if some warrant laughing at. Especially something like the latter example.
Football has always kept me happy, even during my bad moments like now. I've always had my own projects and work in both spanish and english. Its been able to keep me occupied for the longest time and help me forget all my problems. I'm well respected on Twitter actually for what I do so all the followers and fans of my work, they keep encouraging me to keep doing what I love. None of them know I am depressed and I rather keep it that way as that would be the way to undo everything I've worked for. However, as of late the problem has become so serious that football has only been able to distract me temporarely, and now I've gone back to worrying about my future. If my dreams are going to be crushed one day due to my anxiety, and many more reasons that are personal.
Something has occured this year though that might be the cure to my problems. Yes, you guessed it. Its the Peruvian national team. Here in Peru we value international football more than club. The whole country unites whenever Peru plays, and this year its gotten better. Peru is currently in 4th with 2 games left and we are dreaming. If we qualify, it might cure me completely.
Sure, its not going to solve any of my social problems or cure my future anxiety attacks, but it will for sure distract it for time to go. Football has always been the last thing keeping me happy and its gotten off the pace a bit. No particular reason, more me not knowing what to do and digging deeper into the hole. Peru qualifying for the world cup has always been a dream of mine and the whole country, and honestly its come at the right time. If we qualify, it will give me a reason to continue celebrating the culture of the beloved country and to keep being happy for not only what I do in terms of my job, but also continue to bond with my family and friends. Its a time for the whole nation to get together, and in time we will see if it helps fight my anxiety, which is the war I'm currently in and trying to get out successfully.
Now if we don't qualify for the world cup which is a very realistic situation, that's not to say it will continue to hurt my emotions. I will cry if we don't make it, I will be gutted for days but suicide is never going to be an option for me. I'm happy with the work I do, my job and my career but moreso I'm scared about what will happen in the future. I guess the lesson there would be if they don't qualify, don't be a bottler like them. Learn to not celebrate early, but when the job is done.
I love football, and I will never give up on it.
Anyways, I returned to Peru back last year and I ended life in Canada with some depression. I was staying at home, gaining weight with no one to talk to. I had friends but they were always busy and quite careless about going out. My parents and brother were always out of the house and I really wasn't very happy. That wasn't the reason I moved away as I've been trying to go back to Peru since I was 12. Of course, I wasn't going to be able to look after myself at that age, so when I became 18 I was able to wait until I finished school and finally got my move back despite my parents not exactly being on board with it.
I was really happy when I went back. I got in contact with a lot of my kindergarten friends whom I haven't talked to in 12 years, and they were much more outgoing than the friends I had in Canada, but that's not what this story is about. It relates to football and mental health. I've always been an anxious person, unfortunately. My anxiety attacked me in April and a bunch of my newer mates decided to escape while the ones who truly missed me since kindergarten stuck with me although nowadays they've seen me sufferring so much that the friendship just isn't the same anymore. As for my college mates, they don't really know I'm depressed. I've tried my best to hide it.
Nowadays, its becoming a serious problem. I've not being going to classes and have began thinking about hurting myself but always decide against it mostly due to fear. However, before you stop reading thinking this is one of my narcistic attention seeking stories, this is where football kicks in.
I've always been criticized for my football opinions. Before, it used to get to me a lot because I thought it would affect my journalism dreams. Now, not so much. I'm already working for press and they all value my opinions just as I value theirs. I've learned to not take it so seriously as unfortunately some people don't know the meaning of "respect". Sure, exist bizarre opinions, whether its in someones elses view (saying Hamsik is the best 10 in the world) or just in general (saying Kings Lynn is better than Bayern Munich) but at the end of the day, most opinions are to be respected even if some warrant laughing at. Especially something like the latter example.
Football has always kept me happy, even during my bad moments like now. I've always had my own projects and work in both spanish and english. Its been able to keep me occupied for the longest time and help me forget all my problems. I'm well respected on Twitter actually for what I do so all the followers and fans of my work, they keep encouraging me to keep doing what I love. None of them know I am depressed and I rather keep it that way as that would be the way to undo everything I've worked for. However, as of late the problem has become so serious that football has only been able to distract me temporarely, and now I've gone back to worrying about my future. If my dreams are going to be crushed one day due to my anxiety, and many more reasons that are personal.
Something has occured this year though that might be the cure to my problems. Yes, you guessed it. Its the Peruvian national team. Here in Peru we value international football more than club. The whole country unites whenever Peru plays, and this year its gotten better. Peru is currently in 4th with 2 games left and we are dreaming. If we qualify, it might cure me completely.
Sure, its not going to solve any of my social problems or cure my future anxiety attacks, but it will for sure distract it for time to go. Football has always been the last thing keeping me happy and its gotten off the pace a bit. No particular reason, more me not knowing what to do and digging deeper into the hole. Peru qualifying for the world cup has always been a dream of mine and the whole country, and honestly its come at the right time. If we qualify, it will give me a reason to continue celebrating the culture of the beloved country and to keep being happy for not only what I do in terms of my job, but also continue to bond with my family and friends. Its a time for the whole nation to get together, and in time we will see if it helps fight my anxiety, which is the war I'm currently in and trying to get out successfully.
Now if we don't qualify for the world cup which is a very realistic situation, that's not to say it will continue to hurt my emotions. I will cry if we don't make it, I will be gutted for days but suicide is never going to be an option for me. I'm happy with the work I do, my job and my career but moreso I'm scared about what will happen in the future. I guess the lesson there would be if they don't qualify, don't be a bottler like them. Learn to not celebrate early, but when the job is done.
I love football, and I will never give up on it.
