Bipolar Club Forums.

[daviejones]

Our main one, The Cowsheds, is mostly manic depressive, and a fair few threads just decend into pointless dickwaving. I occasionly frequent it for info, but I'd rather post on here in all honesty. Can't be doing with reading 3 threads on Iain Hume and another 3 on why Adams should go, which all say the same thing.

How's Hume doing? I know he was hyped up a lot when he joined you but he looked tosh when he came on against us, albeit he might not have been fully fit at that stage.

 

[Glasshalffullpools]

Intolerance of other people's views is pretty much what ISIS is all about. Sometimes someone's different opinion is simply a different way of looking at things. I'm warming to Franks now , good job I have an open mind

 

[Reginald Fodstain]

How's Hume doing? I know he was hyped up a lot when he joined you but he looked tosh when he came on against us, albeit he might not have been fully fit at that stage.

Hasn't featured much... due to Adams. Been rumours going round about the specifics. As a fan base we've wanted to see much more of him, and came on on saturday and played well, so hopefully back in the frame. Club legend and better than anything else we've got up front!

 

[Soup Ladle]

The other 5% is Ryan Bird, his friends and his family insisting that he's not an utterly useless player, and that he's never had a chance with us.

So you don't rate him then?

He did okay here and seemed to enjoy himself. Granted he's not the best player we've ever had but is better than what we have at the minute (apart from Fenwick maybe but he's crocked). The lad Hugill who's replaced him looks like he has more about him as a footballer than Bird.

Could see Bird joining in the summer regardless of what league we're in. Would have him have as the first cab off the rank to use a cricket analogy for Fenwick plus one other first choice next season.

 

[AtaturkOzgutson]

Not really, no. Don't get me wrong he has done us good whilst we were in the Conference, and scored some important FA Trophy goals, but that's pretty much it.

He never really impressed against Conference teams in the league and just doesn't have enough about him all round, but still popped up with the occasional goal. He's not done much since playing with us in the league.

Games have a habit of completely bypassing him. I wouldn't mind seeing him elsewhere and doing well, so good luck to him,

 

[shoddycollins]

A breakdown of thread topics on the first two pages of our forum (excluding stickies)

Who owns what percentage of the club? - 16
How can we increase attendances? - 5
Our last game (Oxford away) - 5
How crap is our defensive record / defenders? - 5
General football stuff - 5
Curle, should he stay or should he go? - 3
Are we going down? - 3
Non-football related stuff - 3
To what extent are we underachieving? - 2
What are other clubs in League 2 up to? - 2
Club history - 1
Our next game (Portsmouth home) - 1
Away travel - 1
Non-sequitur light relief - 1
Transfer activity - 1

 

[Sestonpoolie]

Halifax Town's theshaymen.net has become more unhinged over time.

Our manager Neil Aspin joined in April 2009, when we'd finished mid-table in the NPL Division 1 North. I remember it being a bit rational back then, I guess? Few pages if we won, few more if we lost, standard, fairly calm stuff.

In 2012/13, our second season in the Conference North, we'd only played half our games by the start of March due to the weather. We won more away than at home and many teams would use gamesmanship so they wouldn't lose to us, and it was a frustrating time. Two or three people were confident Aspin had taken us as far as he personally could and should leave the club. Then we completed 12 games in April and won the playoffs straight after, joining the Conference. All in the past, surely?

Nah. We quickly became a top half Conference team and a few more "fans" turned up who claimed this season was our only chance to grab promotion for a long time. Miraculously we got into the playoffs as a part-time team but lost out to Cambridge United.

Now this season is apparently our only chance to grab promotion for a long time, we're not looking good for the playoffs and therefore Aspin must go. And there are idiots that think we're bloody rubbish lose, win or draw.

Win and it's several pages now, lose and it'll be at least 15. And we'll go from how bad the players and manager are to how poor the crowds will be to how poor the board is to how apathetic the town is and everything in between.

We also have an exiled fan in Malta who calls for the manager's head every week and runs a personal crusade against the liberal elite, a native Norwegian who rates our players' performances out of 100 for every match from his house in Stavanger who everyone duly marmalises, two super-fans who lay onto each other pretty much every day, a few members of the supporters' football team who abuse anyone with different opinions to them, and a handful of posters who turn up sporadically almost exclusively to pick on one single regular poster they hate.

Yeah ours is in the "mostly miserable" camp.

Is Shaybabes still on the go?

 

[Pliny Harris]

Is Shaybabes still on the go?

Nope. A very pertinent first post though.

And always worth wheeling out this one:

 

[shoddycollins]

Nope. A very pertinent first post though.

And always worth wheeling out this one:

Ah yes I remember this picture on the 'who had the shittest fox-based mascot' discussion on the old forum.

 

[Pliny Harris]

I hope that last post didn't come across as sarcastic and put Sestonpoolie off this place.

 

[shoddycollins]

I hope that last post didn't come across as sarcastic and put Sestonpoolie off this place.

Probably not... the Poolie fans are taking over the forum. I'm starting to regret going on their forum and putting an appeal out for them to come (this time last month the monkeys on the forum were free to wander around completely unmolested).

Anyway... foxes

Was about to ask what on earth Halifax has to do with foxes that you had one as your mascot... but then I thought of it.

I bet it was called Halifox wasn't it?

 

[Pliny Harris]

Dude, you massively underestimate us.

Around '94 I think, holes started appearing in the Shay pitch. After some inspection, old pie crusts were found buried in them, and later an urban fox was caught red-pawed taking discarded tuck shop remains from the terraces and burying them in the pitch. We did the only humane thing and decided, in the changing climate of '90s football, a fox would be a good club mascot for us, and that we'd christen the vulpine vandal Freddy. Because we're very civilised I guess we decided not to kill and stuff the real Freddy and instead ordered a disturbing fox costume for volunteers to wear.

 

[shoddycollins]

Dude, you massively underestimate us.

Around '94 I think, holes started appearing in the Shay pitch. After some inspection, old pie crusts were found buried in them, and later an urban fox was caught red-pawed taking discarded tuck shop remains from the terraces and burying them in the pitch. We did the only humane thing and decided, in the changing climate of '90s football, a fox would be a good club mascot for us, and that we'd christen the vulpine vandal Freddy. Because we're very civilised I guess we decided not to kill and stuff the real Freddy and instead ordered a disturbing fox costume for volunteers to wear.

Looks like you managed to make it much less disturbing the second time around

 

[Pliny Harris]

Yep.

Still worried about how much paw he's trying to cram into those white trainers though.

A more recent Freddy kept taking off his "head" and walking around like that all day doing nowt, which must've been another kiddie upsetter.

 

[shoddycollins]

This is starting to belong on the tinpot thread now, but someone created a wikipedia page for ours
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olga_the_Fox

 

[Glasshalffullpools]

We may be taking over, but not one of us would have had the nerve to do the "Halifox " joke! .....anyway we've only hijacked the relegation thread , hopefully next year it wii be the promotion thread!

 

[shoddycollins]

We may be taking over, but not one of us would have had the nerve to do the "Halifox " joke! .....anyway we've only hijacked the relegation thread , hopefully next year it wii be the promotion thread!

Didn't think it was joke, I honestly thought that must be how Halifax came to have a fox as a mascot.

 

[Glasshalffullpools]

Must have something to do with the surrounding countryside , we had a stag for many years , now it's a ships wheel , can't wait till we go the full hog and just have a monkey , which by the does not cause offence when we are described as Monkey Hangers, we have a Monkey as a mascot and run out to the theme from the monkeys,

 

[Pliny Harris]

This is starting to belong on the tinpot thread now, but someone created a wikipedia page for ours
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olga_the_Fox

Fair play, few fans can boast a 7'1" striker who's been at the club since 1970.

 

[Pliny Harris]

Must have something to do with the surrounding countryside , we had a stag for many years , now it's a ships wheel , can't wait till we go the full hog and just have a monkey , which by the does not cause offence when we are described as Monkey Hangers, we have a Monkey as a mascot and run out to the theme from the monkeys,

Always loved the Monkey Hangers legend although it can't have been fair on the poor monkey. And if a ship's wheel is a bit of a weird choice of mascot, Harrogate Town have a block of sulfur as theirs.

 

[shoddycollins]

Always loved the Monkey Hangers legend although it can't have been fair on the poor monkey. And if a ship's wheel is a bit of a weird choice of mascot, Harrogate Town have a block of sulfur as theirs.

I could never understand why Arsenal have a dinosaur.

I think Glass was talking purely about badges when he mentioned the wheel.

 

[Glasshalffullpools]

Yes I was on about badges, a ships wheel may have been relevant 100 years ago, mind you the Monkey is 200 years out of date! Perhaps we should have a pastie and the Poundland logo on our badge to represent modern day Hartlepool!

 

[Pooliekev]

Yes I was on about badges, a ships wheel may have been relevant 100 years ago, mind you the Monkey is 200 years out of date! Perhaps we should have a pastie and the Poundland logo on our badge to represent modern day Hartlepool!

OOOh bitch, just 'cos you live in dead posh Stockton. We should have a Maoist Red Guard in a blue and white shert (deliberate mis-spelling) bayonetting Martin Scott.

 

[Glasshalffullpools]

Err Billingham actually ; we had 3 pastie shops in the town centre now it's down to 2, a clear sign that the place is on the up, if I stood on my roof I could see Newton Bewley which is in Hartlepool , I can't see Stockton! Mind you I can also see the Moon so If you can see any point to this reply let me know what it is

 

[shoddycollins]

Don't knock pasties and poured I'm in Northampton as we speak. Just broke the rule of a lifetime. Never order a pie south of Warrington. Never doing that again.

 

[Glasshalffullpools]

The problem with Greggs and the like is they don't sell Proper pies , fortunately on my little bit of the earth there are a couple of decent butchers to turn to

 

[Sestonpoolie]

Is it right that the Pound shop shut down in Billingham because a 99p shop opened up opposite?

 

[daviejones]

Is it right that the Pound shop shut down in Billingham because a 99p shop opened up opposite?

You'd be surprised how big an issue this is for pound shops, I watched a whole hour-long documentary on it ages ago. Quite often though if a 99p store suddenly gets a really good product in, the pound store will buy out all their stock and sell it for a penny more just to piss them off. Reading back on that message I realise how sad I am, ah well.

 

[Sestonpoolie]

You'd be surprised how big an issue this is for pound shops, I watched a whole hour-long documentary on it ages ago. Quite often though if a 99p store suddenly gets a really good product in, the pound store will buy out all their stock and sell it for a penny more just to piss them off. Reading back on that message I realise how sad I am, ah well.

Yor right.You need to get a life mate!

 

[Trapdoor]

Exeweb isn't really bipolar, there are just 2 distinct camps.

The moaners who consistently complain about everything at the club, these are people who wouldn't be happy if we were 1-0 up against Bayern in the Champions League Final.

The "toenailers" who consistently believe the manager is the second coming of Jesus and that being 22nd in League 2 is "meeting expectations". They are called toenailers because they are so far up the managers arse that is all you can see of them.