CUFC v CUFC 3/6 (Carlisle v Colchester)

[shoddycollins]

Thread up early because reaching the half-way mark in the CUFC season is a milestone which will require much discussion and build-up... also to prevent cufc17 ruining the thing we've created with one of his crap fred titles. The CUFC league currently looks like this.

____________________P W D L F A GD Pts
CUFC (Colchester) 1 1 0 0 2 0 +2 3
CUFC (Carlisle) 1 0 1 0 2 2 0 1
CUFC (Cambridge) 2 0 1 1 2 4 -2 1

This game is a crucial top of the table fixture, with the winner guaranteed to sit in first place at Christmas. A win for Colchester could all but seal the title while a Carlisle win leaves things somewhat more open. Cambridge look in trouble already and if they don't want to be playing the likes of Chesham United next season (if a CUFC gets relegated they drop to the division of the next CUFC down) will be praying for a draw or Colchester win.

 

[shoddycollins]

The division of the highest CUFC is the Premier League, which this is. Last season though, Colchester won the CUFC championship unopposed, while Carlisle and Cambridge finished level on points, goal-difference AND goals scored. Sadly the FA refused to sanction a play-off to determine the division champions with a spokesman stating 'what the fuck are you on about, this is utter nonsense'. Nice priorities, twatbaskets.

You may wonder how come a CUFC can be relegated by losing the CUFC league, yet Colchester were relegated (or was it Carlisle and Cambridge that were promoted) after winning one. All I can say is that the rules of the CUFC league, much like Habbinalan's stools after a visit to the Stanwix Tandoori, are very fluid, and also slightly burny.

 

[cufc17]

I was actually remembered about the CUFC league and would've continued the trend!

We're definitely capable of winning this tinpot league, Cambridge are simply relegation fodder though Colchester will give us a run for our money.

Seriously though, hopefully we get a win and cement a place in the playoffs ahead of an away trip to Morecambe. Colchester are a decent side and will fancy themselves for at least a point.

 

[shoddycollins]

bump - to prevent people from accidentally starting new threads for this match, I know it's the game of the season but just one thread per match please

 

[Vanni]

Shoddy may think otherwise but we've won this in 2014 and we repeated the feat last year too. It's going to be very hard to win it three times in a row but you never know.

2014 - Cambridge vs Carlisle home 5-0/away 1-0 (agg 6-0)
2015 - home 0-0/away 4-4 (agg 4-4*)

*No deciders are needed in the CUFC league, as in the event of a tie, the following come into play - 1)away goals 2)final league position.

It feels good to be the Championship winners twice in a row

 

[shoddycollins]

Shoddy may think otherwise but we've won this in 2014 and we repeated the feat last year too. It's going to be very hard to win it three times in a row but you never know.

2014 - Cambridge vs Carlisle home 5-0/away 1-0 (agg 6-0)
2015 - home 0-0/away 4-4 (agg 4-4*)

*No deciders are needed in the CUFC league, as in the event of a tie, the following come into play - 1)away goals 2)final league position.

It feels good to be the Championship winners twice in a row

Fuck off away goals, since when do away goals count in the league?

 

[Carver]

Ey up Vanni you toff smug BASTARD, shut up or I'm gonna turn you into baked beans!!

We are undoubtedly the best CUFC there is, not your fucking top hat club.

 

[shoddycollins]

Ey up Vanni you toff smug BASTARD, shut up or I'm gonna turn you into baked beans!!

A g-g-g-g-g-g-ghooooost!

How was Durham Carver?

 

[Carver]

A g-g-g-g-g-g-ghooooost!

How was Durham Carver?

My arse hurts a lot, but ah apart from that it weren't so bad.

Hey Shoddy I got banned from here for 2 months for no bloody reason and without a warning, you know when the site kept going down and you couldn't post anything. Well I was getting pissed off with it so I went onto the technical support thing and criticised the site in a constructive manner and I made a simple suggestion (Not knowing at the time that there was nothing they could do), so then I got banned for it. They said that I "Complained without reading beforehand". I was like are you serious? There was nothing saying that if I complained then I'd get banned for 2 friggin months, but come on there are people who post all kinds of bad stuff on here and I get banned for absolutely nothing? A fucking joke like, if it had only been 1 week then I wouldn't of cared so much, but two months.

Here is the post where I was so rebellious and out of order:
http://www.onefootballforum.co.uk/index.php?threads/accessing-the-forum.11062/page-4#post-468319

I think I'll just stay in the L2 bit eh.

 

[hellogregory]

Welcome back Carver! Mowgli has missed you dearly. I tried to get him to visit you in Durham but he was having none of it.

 

[Vanni]

'So I went onto the technical support thing and criticised the site in a constructive manner and I made a simple suggestion', says my good buddy Carver. 'Just stop the site using pop ups then. Ridiculous!' is his idea of constructive criticism.

And anyway Carver, I'm not an idiot and don't for a second believe that was the main reason you got yourself banned. But still, welcome back!

 

[Carver]

Welcome back Carver! Mowgli has missed you dearly. I tried to get him to visit you in Durham but he was having none of it.

Aye well that's probably because we beat them, I've got to say Gregory though after looking at it I was disappointed with the lack of anti-Wycombe posts in the thread for that match. You could of at least called him craven.

 

[Carver]

' And anyway Carver, I'm not an idiot and don't for a second believe that was the main reason you got yourself banned. But still, welcome back!

It's the truth Vanni, I wouldn't of believed it either and I am being serious.

However it's over now, at long bloody last!

So tell me Vanni, why have Cambridge had such a bad start?? I had you down as play off contenders at least.

 

[shoddycollins]

Aye well that's probably because we beat them, I've got to say Gregory though after looking at it I was disappointed with the lack of anti-Wycombe posts in the thread for that match. You could of at least called him craven.

Mainly because nobody besides you actually cares about Wycombe (and I include the Wycombe fans in that) this is the big one.

 

[Carver]

Mainly because nobody besides you actually cares about Wycombe (and I include the Wycombe fans in that) this is the big one.

That's a good point about Wycombe Shoddy, so I'll talk about the match tomorrow.

Colchester, do they even have any fans on here? I know their ground is always empty but do they not even have any online fans either?

As for us, I'm happy with the start we've made Shoddy, but looking at the games ahead we really do need to WIN more than we draw.

 

[Vanni]

It's the truth Vanni, I wouldn't of believed it either and I am being serious.

However it's over now, at long bloody last!

So tell me Vanni, why have Cambridge had such a bad start?? I had you down as play off contenders at least.

For a start, we didn't adequately replace the quality loan players we had last season like Furlong, Spencer and Ledson. Substandard players have come in instead, and it really shows. Several players are also off form, including the strikers, and we're certainly not helped by an ever increasing list of injured players. And oh, Derry is not a good manager. That's about it I think.

As for you lot, I believe you'll make the play offs easily, in fact I wouldn't be surprised if you go one better and make the top 3. You look solid enough, and perhaps more importantly, very consistent too. Plus, there are no standout sides this year, although some sides like Pompey and Luton aren't too far off.

 

[dedwardp]

I'm not too sure what to make of us just yet really - we've looked really good in spells and halves and so on, but very average at other times. Excellent in the second half against Exeter, but woeful in the first - likewise against Blackpool. Excellent against Cambridge and Grimsby, but terrible against Accrington. A level above for 20 minutes at Barnet, before retreating into full on defensive mode for an hour and throwing it away.

The only team I've seen so far that I've thought to look half decent was Exeter, who passed us off the pitch in the first half of our game. There's comfortably a place in the top seven there for the taking if we can develop some sort of consistency, but I'm yet to be convinced we've got it in us and too many of the usual eleven have flattered to deceive so far. We still look uncertain at the back - it is better than last year but then it couldn't be worse than 99 league goals against.

Fancy us to get something tomorrow though. Carlisle's start to the season is pretty much identical to one we had five or six years ago under John Ward - everyone going on about the unbeaten run and how turning a couple more draws into wins would have us right up there etc, when we've drawn 80% of the games on the run. Unfortunately, it went the other way and we slid down into midtable.

 

[hellogregory]

After 2 good results over the last week, I'm kind of expecting us to win.

Therefore this is an away banker. CUFC 1-2 CUFC

 

[hellogregory]

Same horrendous formation and selection that played Wycombe

Hope we scrape a scrappy narrow win again

 

[cufc17]

Why do we persist with playing Kennedy on the wing? Doesn't work.

 

[hellogregory]

Fuck me this is boring. That half felt like half a season not half a match.

We are so toothless at home it's becoming embarrassing. We have to keep a clean sheet to stand a chance of winning, we've proved that this season.

If we go a goal behind here we're in big trouble, but in all honesty this has 0-0 written all over it. 2 absolutely woeful teams cancelling each other out. We won't get crowds back by serving this shit up that's for sure. I could have fell asleep that half it was that boring.

 

[Vanni]

Good win boys. Dunno why some of you were apprehensive of playing Colchester. They're only an average side and will end up in something like 14-16th come May. Which makes our failure to not even get one shot on target at theirs all the more harder to take. I'm still hurt by that defeat.

 

[cufc17]

Up to third!

Still not the greatest of performances, though better than last week, but the three points are most important. 11 unbeaten and some winnable games coming up.

 

[Carver]

We are finally in the top 3!!!

I know the second half wasn't pretty but who cares? We won against a decent Colchester team. Wins get you promoted from this league, not fancy ineffective stuff, you agree with that Gregory?

 

[hellogregory]

Well that was an absolutely shocking game, arguably our worst home performance I'd say, but a 2-0 win is a great result.

Maybe this team can get playoffs, because although we look decent away from home (Blackpool aside), we've been piss poor at home in my opinion so it makes me wonder what could happen if we actually start playing well at home!

 

[hellogregory]

Up to third!

Still not the greatest of performances, though better than last week, but the three points are most important. 11 unbeaten and some winnable games coming up.

Really? I thought today was worse. That today was the first time this season where I've seen us unable to get out of our own half for a period of the match. They had us backs to the wall for a good 25 minutes after the first goal.

 

[cufc17]

Really? I thought today was worse. That today was the first time this season where I've seen us unable to get out of our own half for a period of the match. They had us backs to the wall for a good 25 minutes after the first goal.

Colchester are a better side for me than Wycombe, and I felt we still created numerous good chances today. Like I said, I don't think it was a great performance but the result and clean sheet is good enough for me.

 

[Carver]

Come on Greg since when were we ever capable of playing good and winning at the same time?

We can never combine the two, a win is a win and better that than us playing like Barcelona but failing to win.

 

[hellogregory]

Colchester are a better side for me than Wycombe, and I felt we still created numerous good chances today. Like I said, I don't think it was a great performance but the result and clean sheet is good enough for me.

We created next to nothing from open play today, particularly first half. In fact apart from the couple of chances in the last 10 minutes when we were 2-0 up and Colchester were piling forward, I can't remember us creating anything from open play

 

[shoddycollins]

The scoreline flattered us somewhat but there's more than one way to win a game and since we've struggled to win pretty, why not win ugly with two scrappy goals from corners? Scoring scrappy goals is what Jason Kennedy was born for so I'm glad he was on the pitch.

There may have been plenty in the performance for HG to moan about but we are showing a lot of resilience this season, stuff just seems to come off for us, we're always likely to score and we soak up a lot of pressure, so statistically we are likely to come out on top of these difficult niggly encounters.

Also, to be fair I think Colchester are a very good side, the best performance I've seen from an opposition myself this season. I thought Brindley, Guthrie and Fosu Henry were all outstanding today and didn't deserve to go down 2-0, but them's the breaks. It was a fairly dull game between two decent passing sides but with little incision, in which the luck fell kindly to us twice and not to Colchester. Colchester will probably be disappointed with some woeful finishing though, how Szomidics put what should have been the equaliser over the bar will forever remain a mystery. It reminded me of some of our own games, particularly early on where we put together some really impressive attacks and then totally failed to apply the end product.