Stickied The Mental Health Thread.

TractorBoys

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Yeah, already have a solicitor trying to work things from the outside. Too much red tape, unfortunately.
 
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I'm fucking sick of this time of year, two years in a row now everything has gone tits up.

Around September/October last year, missus takes an overdose. September this year, missus takes an overdose. Last November/December, my cousin has mental breakdown and tries to kill herself, past few weeks, she seems to be going that way again.

It has gotten to the point where, probably selfishly, I've started cutting back on seeing my cousin, because I can't handle it at the moment, and mine and the missus' relationship is barely there. We barely talk any more, hardly eat together, the only interaction we really have is a kiss goodnight, we've had sex once since June, I am seriously questioning my own feelings for her, but don't want to make either her or myself homeless, but I am also questioning her feelings too, as there seems to be nothing there anymore.

I still care for her and love her absolutely, but there seems to be no relationship, no common interests any more, no motivation to spend time together. This lot has led to me drinking a lot more than I usually would, purely due to the stresses of everything and as some kind of a way to cope, plus it's a way to get out of the flat where I am living with someone who I no longer look at the same, and I don't believe she does either.

Genuinely have no idea what to do here, and it's seriously getting me down, I am fluctuating between sad and angry again, and last time I did this, I ended up on antidepressants, eating like crazy, not sleeping, and not feeling anything. I'd rather be sad and angry than numb again. Though I do appreciate there are potentially other things I can try, I just don't feel I need medical help right now.

I'm just fed up, and if I had the money/passport, I'd have probably fucked off abroad somewhere just to get away from things for a while. I've never felt like I need to run away, but it's something that's been in the back of my mind for a while.
 

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Sorry to hear about your situation Jase, she's obviously just as sad & upset about how the relationship has deteriorated, is counselling for you both not an option?

Best wishes mate.
 

TractorBoys

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Discharge meeting pushed to Monday at 4pm- with still no guarantees. Joke of a system.
 

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I'm fucking sick of this time of year, two years in a row now everything has gone tits up.

Around September/October last year, missus takes an overdose. September this year, missus takes an overdose. Last November/December, my cousin has mental breakdown and tries to kill herself, past few weeks, she seems to be going that way again.

It has gotten to the point where, probably selfishly, I've started cutting back on seeing my cousin, because I can't handle it at the moment, and mine and the missus' relationship is barely there. We barely talk any more, hardly eat together, the only interaction we really have is a kiss goodnight, we've had sex once since June, I am seriously questioning my own feelings for her, but don't want to make either her or myself homeless, but I am also questioning her feelings too, as there seems to be nothing there anymore.

I still care for her and love her absolutely, but there seems to be no relationship, no common interests any more, no motivation to spend time together. This lot has led to me drinking a lot more than I usually would, purely due to the stresses of everything and as some kind of a way to cope, plus it's a way to get out of the flat where I am living with someone who I no longer look at the same, and I don't believe she does either.

Genuinely have no idea what to do here, and it's seriously getting me down, I am fluctuating between sad and angry again, and last time I did this, I ended up on antidepressants, eating like crazy, not sleeping, and not feeling anything. I'd rather be sad and angry than numb again. Though I do appreciate there are potentially other things I can try, I just don't feel I need medical help right now.

I'm just fed up, and if I had the money/passport, I'd have probably fucked off abroad somewhere just to get away from things for a while. I've never felt like I need to run away, but it's something that's been in the back of my mind for a while.
How come you don't have a passport?
 
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Because mine expired in 2011 and it costs £72.50 to get the thing renewed, another thing that comes down to money, which I am severely lacking.
 

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Formulation and discharge review at 4pm... cross your fingers lads.
images
 

TractorBoys

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Bi Polar Disorder and Impulsive Control Disorder... too exhausted to explain what this means and how it's dealt with tonight; but I am home. Get my cats back tomorrow, too. Will revisit this thread tomorrow and explain what happens night.

So drained but so happy to be home. Cheers for all the messages and likes. Nightmare 11 days.
 

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Good news TB get some rest and look after yourself.
 

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Glad to hear you're home again TB. Do keep in touch and take care of yourself.
 

TractorBoys

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I figured I'd post this so I don't have to have the same conversation 15 times... after 11 days I was discharged yesterday, complete with a diagnosis for Bi Polar Spectrum Disorder, & Impulsive Control Disorder. I've been told that the 9 years I've lived with it without medication has made it next to impossible to lead a normal life; which goes some ways to explaining how wreckless & difficult I can be, in addition to my regular abuse of drugs & alcohol. The medication I'm starting is a mood stabiliser and should, along with other treatment, stablise my mood (clues in the name!) and prevent such manic highs and lows, or at least make them more manageable. I'm not kidding myself that it's a magic pill, but I'm honestly both optimistic and excited about what this could mean for me.

The diagnosis was made by 7 professionals in 1 room - a massive change to the 1 on 1 consultations I've been used to over the years. I'm mentally drained but ready to do this, finally I have some understanding of why I do certain things and hopefully I can stop beating myself up about it which has a negative effect on my mood/behaviour. Thank you to everyone who has sent me a message and passed on well wishes, it's appreciated. If I haven't replied (yet) it's simply because so much has been going on but it's made it all easier and I am grateful to everyone!

I'm now home and have a stringent care plan to follow & believe in. And more importantly, I have my two cats back-I think they've forgiven me for my absence! Thanks for reading, #ESSAY !
 

Leo

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I figured I'd post this so I don't have to have the same conversation 15 times... after 11 days I was discharged yesterday, complete with a diagnosis for Bi Polar Spectrum Disorder, & Impulsive Control Disorder. I've been told that the 9 years I've lived with it without medication has made it next to impossible to lead a normal life; which goes some ways to explaining how wreckless & difficult I can be, in addition to my regular abuse of drugs & alcohol. The medication I'm starting is a mood stabiliser and should, along with other treatment, stablise my mood (clues in the name!) and prevent such manic highs and lows, or at least make them more manageable. I'm not kidding myself that it's a magic pill, but I'm honestly both optimistic and excited about what this could mean for me.

The diagnosis was made by 7 professionals in 1 room - a massive change to the 1 on 1 consultations I've been used to over the years. I'm mentally drained but ready to do this, finally I have some understanding of why I do certain things and hopefully I can stop beating myself up about it which has a negative effect on my mood/behaviour. Thank you to everyone who has sent me a message and passed on well wishes, it's appreciated. If I haven't replied (yet) it's simply because so much has been going on but it's made it all easier and I am grateful to everyone!

I'm now home and have a stringent care plan to follow & believe in. And more importantly, I have my two cats back-I think they've forgiven me for my absence! Thanks for reading, #ESSAY !
Informative post TB....nice to read you're back to where you want to be at the moment. No doubt the cats will help with a calming effect. Nice one mate.
 

Magic

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Double or quits on Hillary winning the next election TB? :hesk:

Just kidding mate - glad to hear you're back home.
 

TractorBoys

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Fucking scandalous. Thought it was a sure thing.
 

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I thought I would start a thread to discuss mental health issues. I have seen mental health being discussed on other threads and thought it might be helpful to have a dedicated thread. I can completely understand why people wouldn't want to post their experiences here but I think it is important to talk about these issues.
personally this subject has a relevance for me, I've just completed 6 months free from psych drugs for the first time in over 20 years.
I'm going to use therapy and learned coping techniques to see if I can live my life free from prescriptions.
Anyway I hope this can be an interesting and helpful thread.

Good thread Aber. It’s great to see people discussing mental health openly. In the past I have worked on a mental health initiative that aimd to use football as a means to reach men that are often labelled as ‘hard to reach’. In your view, do you think that football clubs could play a role in de-stigmatising mental health?
 

Aber gas

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Good thread Aber. It’s great to see people discussing mental health openly. In the past I have worked on a mental health initiative that aimd to use football as a means to reach men that are often labelled as ‘hard to reach’. In your view, do you think that football clubs could play a role in de-stigmatising mental health?
It's a good idea and could definitely be effective. Especially to reach men who are put off seeking help by stigma. I think we've come a long way recently with footballers ( more often retired) talking about their experiences in the media. Have you got a link for the imitative as it sounds interesting and something I could propose to my club? ( I understand if you don't want to post it)
 

TractorBoys

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Max

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I went ahead and started this community page to help me as much as anything 10 days ago, and I've been pretty fucking bowled over by some of the reaction. Some good people out there, including some pretty well known Twitter names; https://www.facebook.com/bipolarandpersonality/ , https://twitter.com/bipolarpersonal
Well done mate. I think this is a really good idea. The particular issues that you're dealing with are not my forte (I'm more of an obsessive compulsive / anxiety type myself!) but I do think it's always a good idea to reach out and engage with other people that might be able to offer insight into the conditions you're living with. If nothing else, it can't do any harm, and hopefully it will help you to think about you and your mental state in a new way. I absolutely think it's a good idea to 'get to know yourself' (forgive the wank expression) and this is a great way to get new perspectives. Wishing you all the best :2thumb:
 

Deranged Drunk Guy

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I've had depression for 9 years im 26 years old not far from 27. On and off i have had anxiety for 9 years. Had a big panic attack at work yesterday and it looked weird when i was speaking to a worker so now i'm worried about my job.

Where do i think my depression has come from? i will first run you thru my life, I was raised by two simple parents my dad got leukemia when i was 4 and has never worked since before that he was a high earning carpenter who came to Australia was here for 7-8 years before he got leukemia but managed to survive. Mum is a food service worker at a major hospital now for 26 years. I love them dearly but i have given them much grief because of my battles with mental health.

Mum and dad bought a house in 1997 even tho we where poor and managed to pay it off successfully i don't even know how to this day. We never went without always had food always had clothes but in the back of my mind i knew we where poor. In the culture background we are from ( i would not like to mention which one but it is European) our status within the community was poor, meaning i was never going to do well with girls of either my culture heritage because they where just after $$ or the local ones or i was a outsider to because of my weird first name and ethnics are seen as second rate to be brutally honest. During my teenage years i was growing and was considered ugly all though i grew into quite a good looking person my confidence by that stage was shot. To add to this the only relatives we had in this country where my dads sister and her two daughters and husband who where shocking people, the kind who want to see you crash and burn so you don't end up doing better then them financially in life. I or my family have cut all ties with them and i personally haven't spoken to them for 5 years. I wish i had done this sooner.

My parents are religious so i grew up going to church here and there i had nothing against this until i got to about 20 years old 3 years into my battle with depression which i had managed to keep hidden from a lot of people. I started questioning why this was happening to me, these days i am a devout atheist who hates religion sees it as fake money making con artist who dribble BS about life. I believe religion is poison for young minds especially male minds i believe it gave me a wrong out look on life and by the time i realized i was 10 steps behind everyone else in life.

So i grew up with a shocking lack of confidence and no self esteem to speak of apart from when i was playing football in my junior days which i was quite good at. When i got to about 20 i was still playing, now amateur football a decent standard league, my battles with mental health where too much i could barely get out of bed some days or even move let alone run.

I held down a job from 18-20 but went from 21 to 25 jobless because the dep/anxiety where crippling me. I started working again in late 2014 and am now having the same problems coming back to haunt me. I never went to uni i was decent at studies but during high school had no confidence which affected my studies. I've held down decent paying jobs in what i do which i would rather not say but my current job my employers are paying me F all but the main thing is i have a job and am out of the house.

In my mind i don't think i can ever beat this and am thinking it could claim my life one day maybe soon. My out look on life is negative and usually wish that i wasn't even alive. I'm sure i will never make any serious money but i knew that i think from my early days. I have only gone into a little detail but if anyone is interested feel free to ask any questions.
 

Dolph Ziggler

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I met the recent ex while I was still with the old one, which is why I understood it at first.

Hi mate, Longtime no speak.

I've been going through a pretty similar situation. Last week I won in court and got joint care.

Go down the legal route mate, it's hard at first and it's stressful, but it works if you're a good person.

How your relationship with your ex ended has no bearing on your relationship with your child.
 

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Guess I should make my first post on this thread.

I've been really, really struggling this past year - however it's finally got to the point where I have to do something about it. My mood/demeanour seems to fluctuate from severely happy/manic to highly irritable at the flick of a switch if something doesn't go my way/as planned, and it seems to manifest itself most often at work, and it's affecting my performance as well as my relationship with my colleagues, all of whom are very good people.

I ended up losing my long-term girlfriend nearly a year to this time - whether this subconsciously played a part, I'm not too sure, because I made a swathe of terrible decisions towards the end, and I have to live with losing the one person I saw spending my life with. All I know is that it's absolutely terrifying having absolutely no control over my emotions at times, I'm a very driven person, and it feels like self-sabotage.

I had a meeting on Friday and talked to my family about this all weekend, and have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Feels horrific at the minute but I hope this is the first step to regaining to what I regard as my true self.
 

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Hey CrazyImp

I know a little about carrying open wounds, not tending to those wounds - for whatever reasons - and letting that proverbial fire's destructive reach grow. That too semi-consciously, but at the same time without intent.

I've been really, really struggling this past year - however it's finally got to the point where I have to do something about it.
I ended up losing my long-term girlfriend nearly a year to this time - whether this subconsciously played a part, I'm not too sure, because I made a swathe of terrible decisions towards the end, and I have to live with losing the one person I saw spending my life with.
it feels like self-sabotage.

It is. The question is what drives the self-sabotage. Maybe [could be], that you haven't reconciled your regret in a way that turns it in to a learning curve sort of thing? Or is it that somewhere in your consciousness, you're giving yourself [false] hope that it can be changed around, only to bump yourself on the head with the 'well no, it's not gonna happen anymore cos you've gone and fucked it' mallet?

All I know is that it's absolutely terrifying having absolutely no control over my emotions at times

Emotions are driven by thought.(edit: and emotions drive thought. it's a cycle.) Control the sequence of thought, and you control your emotions.

I had a meeting on Friday and talked to my family about this all weekend, and have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Feels horrific at the minute but I hope this is the first step to regaining to what I regard as my true self.

Talking always helps. Because it makes things more real. Sometimes you may have rationally dealt with a particular thought or emotion in your head, but have to bounce it off someone to get the 'feelz'.

Hope I've helped in some way.

All the best.
 
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Dolph Ziggler

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Guess I should make my first post on this thread.

I've been really, really struggling this past year - however it's finally got to the point where I have to do something about it. My mood/demeanour seems to fluctuate from severely happy/manic to highly irritable at the flick of a switch if something doesn't go my way/as planned, and it seems to manifest itself most often at work, and it's affecting my performance as well as my relationship with my colleagues, all of whom are very good people.

I ended up losing my long-term girlfriend nearly a year to this time - whether this subconsciously played a part, I'm not too sure, because I made a swathe of terrible decisions towards the end, and I have to live with losing the one person I saw spending my life with. All I know is that it's absolutely terrifying having absolutely no control over my emotions at times, I'm a very driven person, and it feels like self-sabotage.

I had a meeting on Friday and talked to my family about this all weekend, and have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Feels horrific at the minute but I hope this is the first step to regaining to what I regard as my true self.

Hi mate,

About 18 months ago, I split from the mother of my children. She was abusive both mentally and physically and it drove me further and further into depression. Eventually I plucked up the courage to get out and fight back for the sake of my kids.

It has been the most stressful, upsetting and angering 18 months of my life.

Last month I stood in court whilst a judge sided with me and things turned in my favour. I don't know the full in's and out's of your situation, but trust me when I say that it DOES get better, even when it seems unbearable, you keep on fighting because you have something worth fighting for.

Keep your chin up, you've taken the hardest step by talking - I'm not saying it'll be easy, but you're well on your way to getting better.

Good luck.
 

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Thank you for the kind wishes guys.

So I saw the doctor today, initial verdict is that it's mild to moderate depression but with the possibility of a few other different things, but she heavily encouraged me to take up the counselling option, as it appears there may be unresolved issues in relation to what triggers the rollercoaster-like moods. Prescribed some Citalopram as well.

Signed off work for a fortnight which I hate the idea of (because I'm a stubborn shit), but appreciate it's a necessity. Will keep the thread updated.
 
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I will say that Citalopram is evil. Especially when it comes to coming off it. But then, different strokes for different folks.
 

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