The shit strikers thread

[Colinmorriswalksonwater]

Got to throw Goodship in. NLS is his level, no higher.

 

[appletablepenny]

Both of our No 9s have been sent out on loan into the NLN this week. We have no strikers at all now, as opposed to having no strikers worthy of the description.

 

[DontBringBertie]

Inih Effiong.

 

[rudebwoyben]

Inih Effiong.

Agreed

 

[Who Needs Mourinho]

Agreed

He always bloody scores against us. Think we were interested in him a couple of summers ago but he didn’t want to be back-up to Bennett so went to Stevenage.

Based on this season alone, Alex Reid is putting himself as a contender for this thread.

 

[EnglishRed]

Inih Effiong.

Is he the massive guy?

When he came on against us he seemed to cause loads of problems until we realised he couldn't shoot. Zero end product.

 

[chipmunx]

Is he the massive guy?

When he came on against us he seemed to cause loads of problems until we realised he couldn't shoot. Zero end product.

yep - that's him... we signed him from Biggleswade in one of the Southern leagues. He tries hard, defences hate him, but there's little end product. scored 1 goal for us i think (vs Tranmere), was very surprised that he's played most of the time since in L2 or NL...

 

[EnglishRed]

yep - that's him... we signed him from Biggleswade in one of the Southern leagues. He tries hard, defences hate him, but there's little end product. scored 1 goal for us i think (vs Tranmere), was very surprised that he's played most of the time since in L2 or NL...

Looks like the kind of guy you throw on to cause mayhem in the box, and hopefully create opportunities for more skillful players. I'd he could play he'd be at a much higher level, he's a hell of a physical specimen- as it is he doesn't look good enough for National League from what little ive seen.

 

[BarraMatt]

Even the solitary goal he scored for us shouldn't have stood as Moussa Diarra barged their keeper into the back of his own net (skip to 4:10 below). The fact it was allowed must go down as one the National League's classic refereeing moments.

Before anyone says, I have got the highlights bookmarked as it was a famous and historic victory.

 

[doveranddover]

Memo - check spelling before tweeting

https://twitter.com/x/status/1477311284509085698

 

[doveranddover]

I meant to put the previous post on the tinpot thread but it might be better here after all

 

[Colinmorriswalksonwater]

Yep, steer clear of signing McCleary.

 

[DontBringBertie]

Looks like the kind of guy you throw on to cause mayhem in the box, and hopefully create opportunities for more skillful players. I'd he could play he'd be at a much higher level, he's a hell of a physical specimen- as it is he doesn't look good enough for National League from what little ive seen.

He’s actually terrible in the air. Think I’ve only ever seen him score one header and even then he was completely unmarked and the Maidenhead keeper came out and got nowhere near the ball.

Got a bit of pace but get tired after about 60 minutes every week. And yep, can’t finish at all.

 

[karlready]

FFS, hot rumour has it that Harry Panaytiou is on his way back to Aldershot. Presumably Corey Andrews loan is not renewing. Unbelievable..

 

[iesty wfc]

Is he the massive guy?

When he came on against us he seemed to cause loads of problems until we realised he couldn't shoot. Zero end product.

we were heavily linked with him about 2 or 3 summers ago and people were genuinely disappointed that we missed out on him

 

[DontBringBertie]

we were heavily linked with him about 2 or 3 summers ago and people were genuinely disappointed that we missed out on him

How’s Jake Hyde getting on by the way?

Was a good player for us, just made of biscuits.

 

[iesty wfc]

How’s Jake Hyde getting on by the way?

Was a good player for us, just made of biscuits.

he's doing alright but he has progressed from biscuits to the supermarket own brand multipack crisps now

10 starts (3 subs) - 3 goals

missed 6 weeks from October, and on and off since then

 

[EnglishRed]

How’s Jake Hyde getting on by the way?

Was a good player for us, just made of biscuits.

you've answered your own question! exactly the same. Good when fit but rarely fit.

I dont think anyone expected anything different though, given his record at Woking and Halifax. I expect a striker to sign this month.

 

[DontBringBertie]

you've answered your own question! exactly the same. Good when fit but rarely fit.

I dont think anyone expected anything different though, given his record at Woking and Halifax. I expect a striker to sign this month.

Just seen he’s injured for 8 weeks. Absolute biscuits.

 

[Master D]

I forgot he existed. He's just pointless by this stage. Need 2 strikers this month.

 

[GTFCfish]

Just seen he’s injured for 8 weeks. Absolute biscuits.

Let’s hope they don’t draw Alfreton in any of the cups or Matt Rhead will eat him.

 

[chipmunx]

Let’s hope they don’t draw Alfreton in any of the cups or Matt Rhead will eat him.

and he'd still be hungry afterwards....

 

[EnglishRed]

One of our podcasts 'Fearless in Devotion', features Sam Ricketts this week. He has an anecdote about Mike Fondop- he was so bad at running in training the club sent him for a heart scan because they thought there might be something wrong with him.

 

[Chief Rocka]

One of our podcasts 'Fearless in Devotion', features Sam Ricketts this week. He has an anecdote about Mike Fondop- he was so bad at running in training the club sent him for a heart scan because they thought there might be something wrong with him.

There is 100% something wrong with him and it starts and finishes in the brain, he is batshit crazy bananas.

 

[EnglishRed]

There is 100% something wrong with him and it starts and finishes in the brain, he is batshit crazy bananas.

He is absolutely mental.

Can you imagine if he was your Actuary?

 

[AJS]

Jordan Slew now into double figures for the season. Maybe he’s eligible to be moved out of this thread now:..

 

[TheShayWay]

Jordan Slew now into double figures for the season. Maybe he’s eligible to be moved out of this thread now:..

Why isn't there a mediocre strikers thread

 

[Chief Rocka]

He is absolutely mental.

Can you imagine if he was your Actuary?

Not that he ever left this thread but this was Big Mike at his best at the weekend,

https://twitter.com/x/status/1480327859927457797

Could've farted harder.

 

[Soup Ladle]

A sad day in the history of Hartlepool United as they part company with Mike Fondop-Talim. Although he didn't actually score a single goal, I'm sure he will tear this league apart when someone Wrexham or Stockport pick him up.

 

[SuperHans]

Not that he ever left this thread but this was Big Mike at his best at the weekend,

https://twitter.com/x/status/1480327859927457797

Could've farted harder.

That’s quality. How can you finish that badly?