1FF Wars

[Spirederman]

Honestly, since the start it feels like Aladdin has been one of the most offered characters, I swear every team has had like 3 chances to sign him Me and Munkiki have been sat back desperately trying not to scream at people for not signing him, knowing what he can bring to the table... was a relief to finally see somebody take the plunge!

You mean you and Munks thought ' What a relief those bastards at GNC who we hate, didn't sign him ' ?

 

[Oaf]

Come along now Spirederman, you know it's not like that. We hate all teams equally.

 

[last request]

Honestly, since the start it feels like Aladdin has been one of the most offered characters, I swear every team has had like 3 chances to sign him Me and Munkiki have been sat back desperately trying not to scream at people for not signing him, knowing what he can bring to the table... was a relief to finally see somebody take the plunge!

We've never been offered him, despite winning 5 faction battles and choosing Disney every time. All your fault Jar Jar Jinder. I knew Genie was out there as well since you asked me to include him in the trailer.

I didn't include him though. Probably why you gave us crap like Peter Pan and Baloo - OUT OF SPITE.

 

[Don Tonberry]

We've never been offered him, despite winning 5 faction battles and choosing Disney every time. All your fault Jar Jar Jinder. I knew Genie was out there as well since you asked me to include him in the trailer.

I didn't include him though. Probably why you gave us crap like Peter Pan and Baloo - OUT OF SPITE.

Not to mention the magic fucking broom. Twice!

 

[Oaf]

Are you telling me that this badass wouldn't have been a great addition? Your floors would never be dirty again!

 

[Oaf]

I guess you'll never know now, will you

 

[Munkiki]

Normandy Beach – Lightweight
John Cena (T6) vs Daenerys Targaryen (3DD) vs Indiana Jones (GNC)

Daenerys looked completely lost in this fight and it didn't take long for Cena to do some wrestling shit on her. He was favourite but somehow Indy wipes the floor with him. GNC take Normandy Beach.

Cena doesn't take damage for losing fights, Daenerys does and despite winning, Indy takes 1HP damage for his troubles.

TARDIS – Lightweight
Baloo (SBF) vs Genie of the Lamp (STAG)

This is the one fight Stagnificent hadn't guaranteed themselves a win but it didn't stop them. Genie, probably a bit pissed off that freedom hadn't be granted, uses Baloo as a punching bag to relieve some of that anger. Being a bear, Baloo can take a hit and gives as good as he gets for the most part but he just narrowly loses out.

Rapture – Middleweight
Hit Man Fight
Big Daddy (STAG) vs Mewtwo (SBF)

He wasn't sure why but Mewtwo found himself unable to put his all into this fight. Big Daddy toy with him for a while, humouring him, before using his drill to brutal effect. While unconscious, Little Sister drains Mewtwo of some of his ADAM. STAG gain an ADAM Vial.

Nostromo – Middleweight
Random Character Fight
Mewtwo (SBF) vs Scorpion (GNC) vs Goofy (T6)

In Mewtwo's second fight of the day, free of his shackles he puts in a better performance. He makes light work of Goofy but again finds himself in a losing battle when Scorpion gets involved. The ninja is just too good for him. GNC take Nostromo.

Hogwarts – Heavyweight
The Bride w/the Golden Axe (3DD) vs Raphael (T6)

Fucking hell, this was quite some battle. Both rolled incredibly high. Raphael falters at the wrong moment though and with some badass combination of sword and axe, Kiddo takes the victory.

Pokémon Stadium – Heavyweight
Gandalf (GNC) vs Captain America (STAG)

Gandalf was serious when he screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS" and puts up a heck of a good fight but something strange is happening. Gandalf can't work out why but Cap isn't taking any damage. Attack after attack but the Avenger just stands there, laughing at the old man. It's like one of those ridiculous Dragon Ball Z fights where they unleash hell on someone and nothing happens. Eventually Cap fights back and puts Gandalf out of his misery.

Xavier's School – Bonus
Random 18BR+ Character for Free
Elsa (3DD) vs Marcus Fenix (STAG) vs Link (SBF) vs Wolverine (GNC)

This had the potential to be a bloodbath. In hindsight, Stay Puft did Trevor a massive favour. He was a lamb being led to the slaughter before Zuul interfered.

Elsa, Link and Wolverine jump straight into battle but they are distracted by Fenix, unnerved by his smug expression as he sat idly by watching them. Suddenly he leaps into action and blows them away with his Chainsaw Gun. None of them avoid the line of fire and they see their hopes of claiming Xavier's School obliterated.

They all take 2HP damage instead of 1, killing Elsa and leaving the other two on death's door.

 

[last request]

Not to mention the magic fucking broom. Twice!

In all fariness, I think one of those offers came "second hand" via GNC. Spire said something a long the lines of "we know you guys love a Disney character so do you want to sign this [shit] broom?". Funny how they didn't offer us Aladdin though when they decided they were going to pass on him.

 

[Don Tonberry]

Are you telling me that this badass wouldn't have been a great addition? Your floors would never be dirty again!

Whenever I think of magic brooms I just think of them from Dark Castle (yeah, THAT Dark Castle) and how irritating they were.

Oh, and this gameweek turned out to be horrendous for us!

 

[last request]

You see GNC, we knew that was going to happen! We just saved Trevor's life!

 

[Oaf]

Corr, that Marcus Fenix ability was a dodgy one with no guaranteed chance of actually being any good... but instead, they managed to use it with deadly efficiency! Brilliant little combo there from Stags to do some serious damage.

 

[The Hand of Dom]

I wanted Aladdin when we were offered him, the others said no!

 

[Munkiki]

GNC:
Indiana Jones gains 1BR and loses 1HP
Gain £50,000
Gain Normandy Beach
Scorpion gains 1BR
Gain £125,000
Gain Nostromo
Gandalf loses 1HP
Lose Pokémon Stadium
Wolverine loses 2HP

3DD:
Daenerys Targaryen loses 1HP
The Bride gains 1BR
Andrew Ryan gains 1 win
Gain £200,000
Elsa is killed
Lose Xavier's School

STAG:
Genie of the Lamp gains 1BR
Gain £50,000
Gain TARDIS
Big Daddy gains 1BR
Gain ADAM Vial
Gain Hitman
Gain £125,000
Captain America gains 1BR
Gain £200,000
Gain Pokémon Stadium
Marcus Fenix gains 1BR
Gain 18BR+ character
Gain £200,000
Gain Xavier's School

SBF:
Baloo loses 1HP
Lose TARDIS
Mewtwo loses 2HP
Lose Nostromo
Link loses 2HP

T6:
John Cena doesn't take damage
Lose Normandy Beach
Goofy loses 1HP
Raphael loses 1HP

 

[Stagat]

Dem gains.

 

[Spirederman]

Given how bad Aladdin is BR wise, got to think One Jump Ahead must be awesome...- MagpieBee

Agree about Aladdin. Not certain Daryl is worth it, though hasn't someone else had a Protector ability and it was alright? - Paul Haddock

One Jump Ahead sounds interesting. Poor base stats like Kaa, his power was useful for a week.-Spire

WHAT A BOTRUS IRRUMBO!

 

[Spirederman]

Hope the free character's wages are astonomical.

 

[Spirederman]

We expected GNC to use Marcus with the Chainsaw Gun in the middleweight battle against us when they possessed him last week!

Yeah, we had a few off days recently.

Focusing solely on you set of twats now.

 

[MagpieBee]

We'll keep on going for victory, the main motivation being that we can't put Spireds in a position where he'd have to edit a bit out of his post signature, I'm not sure he'd be able to cope!

 

[Munkiki]

Wages/earnings paid which brings Week 17 to its conclusion.

Now onto Week 18.

Wolverine is able to regenerate damaged or destroyed tissues of his body. He gains +1HP.


Having created a horcrux - splitting the Cylons' soul by committing the most supreme act of evil, murder, and hiding a fragment in a Med-Pack - when the Cylons were destroyed, they did not die. One cannot die when a part of the soul remains earthbound and undamaged.

After weeks of research, 3DD finally found all they needed to bring back the Cylons.

The Cylons are returned to 3DD with their original stats. The Cursed Med-Pack is used during the resurrection.

 

[Spirederman]

We'll keep on going for victory, the main motivation being that we can't put Spireds in a position where he'd have to edit a bit out of his post signature, I'm not sure he'd be able to cope!

That will never need to be edited out Mags.

TFFWars will never be again.

This is the 1FF version Myself and Harvs will remain reigning TFFWars Champions.

 

[last request]

Very excited about our new signing.

 

[Don Tonberry]

Very excited about our new signing.

Yeah, you're all fucked now.

 

[Spirederman]

We're equally very excited by ours.

 

[Spirederman]

You specifically are fucked SBF

 

[Oaf]

Signings so far:

SBF sign:

Jordan Belfort – 1BR 1HP 1D4 – £500,000/NA – Money Maker (£100k)

And

Barry Scott – 1BR 3HP 1D6 – £150,000/£5,000 – BANG AND THE DIRT IS GONE!

GNC buy:
Rare Candy – £80,000 (gives a character +1BR)

 

[Spirederman]

We passed up on Cillit Bang man last week.

We've had far too many shit signings for that sort of money with useless powers like Rug,Hodor and Precious.

Watch Baz be a fucking game changer.

 

[Don Tonberry]

Barry fucking Scott is going to tear you all a new one.

 

[Oaf]

Stags take on their free offer...

Dr. Manhattan – 20BR unlimited HP 2D6 – £1,000,000/£125,000 – Distancing From Our World

 

[Spirederman]

Fuck me....Doc M....what a signing.

Well played Stags.

 

[PaulHaddock]

Zuul has a new target then.