Clubs in this league in size order

[Bobbin']

 

[Dion'sHead]

This is the most tragic thread on the whole of 1FF.

Bristol City and Coventry ffs, my local Sunday league side are bigger than the two combined.

Charlton

You wouldn't even be in the top 5 biggest in this division IMO.

Anyway my top 5 this season would be:

1. Sheffield United
2. Cov
3. Bradford
4. Milwall
5. Barnsley

Actually, looking at this. Maybe Charlton would be 5th instead of Barnsley if they were shit enough to be in this division.

 

[Bobbin']

I couldn't give a shit where anyone ranks us but nice try insinuating that Millwall would be above us

 

[Dion'sHead]

I couldn't give a shit where anyone ranks us but nice try insinuating that Millwall would be above us

Milwall aren't a big club in the sense of history and support but I think they are the most well known club in this league. I think everyone has heard of Milwall whether that be good or bad. Even Napoli ultras have flags supporting them.

 

[Bobbin']

You're right about that to be fair.

 

[PUSBCCFC]

20
+34 for years in the top flight 54
Established before 1900 +5 59
Chairman has a proper first name +5 64
Original ground held more than 50,000 +15 79
Been in the premier league +20 99
Ground is finished +10 109
Identical stands -10 99
Does not use a portabcabin +15 114 (we use paste tables instead)
Does not have a FY postcode +7 121
Average gate more than 8k +5 126
Away average over 1000 +10 136
Twice on live tv Gillingham and Swindon +4 140
-20 for having an offical recorded song 120

We're massive mate

I didn't realise the amount of points you got for the top flight. Also didn't include chairman having a proper first name. I did take off some points for us still singing 'Go for it City' which was a recorded - which isn't actually a bad song.

 

[HertsWolf]

Using Hertswolf's formula I calculated our score to be 41.

We are fucking massive!!!

Come on, what did yours score? This is science you know.

If you'd fucking grow a pair and be honest at parties, you'd get 51.

 

[THE LAST WALTZ]

If you'd fucking grow a pair and be honest at parties, you'd get 51.

I was OK on that one mate. Where I marked us down was by saying that our ground was not finished, even though our 'temporary stand' is older than most stadiums in this division.
The lack of cinders and mill slag didn't help either!

 

[HertsWolf]

I was OK on that one mate. Where I marked us down was by saying that our ground was not finished, even though our 'temporary stand' is older than most stadiums in this division.
The lack of cinders and mill slag didn't help either!

There's something about walking on that black crunchy surface that says "I'm at an old-style football ground!"

 

[PrestonCha]

I think everyone has heard of Milwall whether that be good or bad. Even Napoli ultras have flags supporting them.

Gaaaaannnnngstaaaaaaa!

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

Burton Albion score a massive 33 points !

 

[HertsWolf]

Burton Albion score a massive 33 points !

Phew! Officially "Tinpot" is up to 32 points. 33 and above is "Massive". Fucking lucky there, mate.

 

[Bartonyellow]

As annoying as it is for the bigger clubs in this league, it could be fleetwood, bury ourselves Walsall and Crewe in the top six. Status counts for nothing. And it's good that football is that way or else life would be boring.

 

[The Alex]

Definitely couldn't be us mate

 

[Hurrikeen]

WABLO

So not us either.

 

[THE TERRACEMAN]

Phew! Officially "Tinpot" is up to 32 points. 33 and above is "Massive". Fucking lucky there, mate.

Absolutely massive ! Well don't think we will get to that for a very long time.

 

[Bartonyellow]

Definitely couldn't be us mate

It was more the point that anyone can go up despite their perceived size or stature.

 

[Fedora Dale]

I make ours 17.

Fortunately, our official club song was recorded by Jimmy Cricket, and NOBODY ever sang it even when it was first released - therefore we scrape double figures.

 

[valefan16]

Not that it matters much but I reckon we shade it just against you lot.

I'll point you to this....

http://www.european-football-statistics.co.uk/attnclub/porv.htm

http://www.european-football-statistics.co.uk/attnclub/bury.htm

Just for a quick break down overall stats (you know for the next time you bang a big list of clubs out who you are historically bigger than)

Port Vale

Total years 102
Major honours = 0
Level 1 Seasons 0
Level 2 Seasons 41
Level 3 Seasons 43
Level 4 Sesons 18

Attendances (highest averages)

1889 - 1939 14.000 1921
1947 - 1985 20.869 1955
1986 - now 9.174 1995

Bury
Total years 110
Major honours = 2
Level 1 Seasons 22
Level 2 Seasons 39
Level 3 Seasons 26
Level 4 Seasons 23

Attendances (highest averages)

1889 - 1939 19.500 1925
1947 - 1985 16.821 1950
1986 - now 6.177 1998

So your statement about Port Vale being a historically bigger club than Bury isn't really as cut and dry as you make it out to be.

Ok Just for the last 76 years then...

 

[HertsWolf]

I make ours 17.

Fortunately, our official club song was recorded by Jimmy Cricket, and NOBODY ever sang it even when it was first released - therefore we scrape double figures.

17 points is not good. Not good at all. Something must be wrong with the formula. Did you see the element that gives an OL11 postcode an extra 20 points?

 

[WhiteRussian]

According to Mr. Wulfs criteria - MK has six points.

 

[WhiteRussian]

And that's including our chairman's name as 'local'

 

[GloverGing]

I think we get -21 overall

 

[Jamo]

87 = MASSIVE
But we all already knew that anyway

Detailed breakdown in spoiler

Spoiler

1. If club (current legal entity) was established before 1900: +5 points = 5 (1887)
2. If chairman or CEO has a proper, local first name. Like Stan, Sid, Norman or Yussuf: = 0 (Patrick, bit too Irish tbh)
3. If club (current legal entity) was established after 1960: -15 points = 0
4. If original ground (before everyone went all seating) held more than 50,000: +15 points = 0 (Fuck knows)
5. If more than 40% of ground is covered in asbestos sheeting: -5 points = 0 (West Stand might be but that's the smallest stand)
6. If any part of the flooring or surface anywhere in the ground is made up of crushed cinders or old mill slag:= 0 (Not sure tbh)
7. If club has ever been in Premier League: + 20 points (in addition to the points earlier) = 20 (1997/1998)
8. If the ground is actually finished. No, we mean completely finished including all the seats, doors, stairs and windows.: +10 points = 30
9. if any stand is the mirror image of any other stand in the ground: - 10 points. = 0
10. If club does not possess or use a portacabin anywhere in the ground: +15 points = 15
11. If the club does not have a FY postcode: +7 points = 7
12. If average gate this last season (regardless of division) was more than 8,000 (+5 points), more than 11,000 (further +5 points), more than 19,804 (further 1 point) = 5 (9,768)
13. If away following averages more than 500 (+5 points), more than 1,000 (further 5 points), more than 1,500 (further +5 points) = 10 (1,069)
14. 2 points for each match when club was live on TV excluding play-offs and pre-season friendlies in Malta or Ireland. = 2 (vs Bradford)
15. Club has recorded official song at any time in its history: -12 points. = 0 (Not to my knowledge)
16. Further -8 points if the song is still sung. = 0
17. Nickname involves fish, fruit, chickens or small dogs: -8 points = -8 (I believe ''Tykes'' are small dogs)
18. If you are so embarrassed at who you support that at parties, you say you support Man Utd or Liverpool: -10 points = 0 (What sort of mincing bellend does this?)
19. If any stand has an official sponsor in its name: -15 points (Further 5 point deduction if sponsor designs, makes, sells or disposes of pies) = -20 (East Stand is the ''Pukka Pies East Stand'' ffs)
20. Tinpot competitions: if you commemorate the winning of any cup open only to lower league clubs (JPT), other tinpot clubs (Dorset Senior Cup) or, say, something like the Anglo-Italian-Faroese-Toto Cup. -10 points. If you **would** celebrate them if you actually ever got past the first round of any of these cups: -15 points. = 0 (Bristol City lol)
21. Aggregate noise. -10 points if at the average home game last season, seated at the back of the main stand, you could hear the players shouting to each other. = 0 (Our players don't communicate)

Edit to add: A debate over which of Coventry and Bristol City are bigger? It's Coventry and it's not even close ffs We're a bigger club than Bristol City.

 

[The Reverend Skyblue]

Jamie, don't open this can of worms again. I don't care whose bigger,it's petty.

I have always liked Bristol City, it goes way back to a fantastic night in 1978 or was it 1979,anyway I've really liked them ever since.

 

[Jamo]

 

[TomPNE94]

87 = MASSIVE
But we all already knew that anyway

Detailed breakdown in spoiler

Spoiler

1. If club (current legal entity) was established before 1900: +5 points = 5 (1887)
2. If chairman or CEO has a proper, local first name. Like Stan, Sid, Norman or Yussuf: = 0 (Patrick, bit too Irish tbh)
3. If club (current legal entity) was established after 1960: -15 points = 0
4. If original ground (before everyone went all seating) held more than 50,000: +15 points = 0 (Fuck knows)
5. If more than 40% of ground is covered in asbestos sheeting: -5 points = 0 (West Stand might be but that's the smallest stand)
6. If any part of the flooring or surface anywhere in the ground is made up of crushed cinders or old mill slag:= 0 (Not sure tbh)
7. If club has ever been in Premier League: + 20 points (in addition to the points earlier) = 20 (1997/1998)
8. If the ground is actually finished. No, we mean completely finished including all the seats, doors, stairs and windows.: +10 points = 30
9. if any stand is the mirror image of any other stand in the ground: - 10 points. = 0
10. If club does not possess or use a portacabin anywhere in the ground: +15 points = 15
11. If the club does not have a FY postcode: +7 points = 7
12. If average gate this last season (regardless of division) was more than 8,000 (+5 points), more than 11,000 (further +5 points), more than 19,804 (further 1 point) = 5 (9,768)
13. If away following averages more than 500 (+5 points), more than 1,000 (further 5 points), more than 1,500 (further +5 points) = 10 (1,069)
14. 2 points for each match when club was live on TV excluding play-offs and pre-season friendlies in Malta or Ireland. = 2 (vs Bradford)
15. Club has recorded official song at any time in its history: -12 points. = 0 (Not to my knowledge)
16. Further -8 points if the song is still sung. = 0
17. Nickname involves fish, fruit, chickens or small dogs: -8 points = -8 (I believe ''Tykes'' are small dogs)
18. If you are so embarrassed at who you support that at parties, you say you support Man Utd or Liverpool: -10 points = 0 (What sort of mincing bellend does this?)
19. If any stand has an official sponsor in its name: -15 points (Further 5 point deduction if sponsor designs, makes, sells or disposes of pies) = -20 (East Stand is the ''Pukka Pies East Stand'' ffs)
20. Tinpot competitions: if you commemorate the winning of any cup open only to lower league clubs (JPT), other tinpot clubs (Dorset Senior Cup) or, say, something like the Anglo-Italian-Faroese-Toto Cup. -10 points. If you **would** celebrate them if you actually ever got past the first round of any of these cups: -15 points. = 0 (Bristol City lol)
21. Aggregate noise. -10 points if at the average home game last season, seated at the back of the main stand, you could hear the players shouting to each other. = 0 (Our players don't communicate)

Edit to add: A debate over which of Coventry and Bristol City are bigger? It's Coventry and it's not even close ffs We're a bigger club than Bristol City.

I'm confused, I make that 46!!!

 

[Jamo]

It probably is. Although I didn't include the 20 you start with on the list. I dunno lol.

 

[JJH]

87 = MASSIVE
But we all already knew that anyway

Detailed breakdown in spoiler

Spoiler

1. If club (current legal entity) was established before 1900: +5 points = 5 (1887)
2. If chairman or CEO has a proper, local first name. Like Stan, Sid, Norman or Yussuf: = 0 (Patrick, bit too Irish tbh)
3. If club (current legal entity) was established after 1960: -15 points = 0
4. If original ground (before everyone went all seating) held more than 50,000: +15 points = 0 (Fuck knows)
5. If more than 40% of ground is covered in asbestos sheeting: -5 points = 0 (West Stand might be but that's the smallest stand)
6. If any part of the flooring or surface anywhere in the ground is made up of crushed cinders or old mill slag:= 0 (Not sure tbh)
7. If club has ever been in Premier League: + 20 points (in addition to the points earlier) = 20 (1997/1998)
8. If the ground is actually finished. No, we mean completely finished including all the seats, doors, stairs and windows.: +10 points = 30
9. if any stand is the mirror image of any other stand in the ground: - 10 points. = 0
10. If club does not possess or use a portacabin anywhere in the ground: +15 points = 15
11. If the club does not have a FY postcode: +7 points = 7
12. If average gate this last season (regardless of division) was more than 8,000 (+5 points), more than 11,000 (further +5 points), more than 19,804 (further 1 point) = 5 (9,768)
13. If away following averages more than 500 (+5 points), more than 1,000 (further 5 points), more than 1,500 (further +5 points) = 10 (1,069)
14. 2 points for each match when club was live on TV excluding play-offs and pre-season friendlies in Malta or Ireland. = 2 (vs Bradford)
15. Club has recorded official song at any time in its history: -12 points. = 0 (Not to my knowledge)
16. Further -8 points if the song is still sung. = 0
17. Nickname involves fish, fruit, chickens or small dogs: -8 points = -8 (I believe ''Tykes'' are small dogs)
18. If you are so embarrassed at who you support that at parties, you say you support Man Utd or Liverpool: -10 points = 0 (What sort of mincing bellend does this?)
19. If any stand has an official sponsor in its name: -15 points (Further 5 point deduction if sponsor designs, makes, sells or disposes of pies) = -20 (East Stand is the ''Pukka Pies East Stand'' ffs)
20. Tinpot competitions: if you commemorate the winning of any cup open only to lower league clubs (JPT), other tinpot clubs (Dorset Senior Cup) or, say, something like the Anglo-Italian-Faroese-Toto Cup. -10 points. If you **would** celebrate them if you actually ever got past the first round of any of these cups: -15 points. = 0 (Bristol City lol)
21. Aggregate noise. -10 points if at the average home game last season, seated at the back of the main stand, you could hear the players shouting to each other. = 0 (Our players don't communicate)

Edit to add: A debate over which of Coventry and Bristol City are bigger? It's Coventry and it's not even close ffs We're a bigger club than Bristol City.

Don't want to start all this big club bollocks again, but on what evidence? 1 year in the top flight in your whole history? Averaging above 20,000 ONCE at home in your entire history?

Sorry - not having that.

 

[SaddlerJonny]

None of you have a leather museum so we're the biggest by right.